Illiterate Businesses

Shopping Should Not Be This Painful

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@ThatsSoBrandon submitted this specimen via Twitter. It's on a great big sign in a Winn Dixie store. I don't know what exactly they are proposing to cut off (or from whom), but it's a relief that you can ask for help after the procedure.

Okay, okay. In all fairness, they did not actually use the word "neuter", but if you read it phonetically it's funny. And, as another Twitterer, @FailedProtostar noted: this is where nurture meets suture!

 

This is More or Less What this Blog is About

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Let it be known that the contributor of this example of egregious product branding, Julie from Toronto, first attempted to right the wrongs:

"I actually emailed the company awhile back suggesting – as politely as possible – that they might want to replace 'Less Calories' to the grammatically correct 'Fewer Calories'. I can’t remember the exact exchange but they told me what the new tagline was to be, and it was equally egregious. I gave up and made some crack along the lines of, 'What can you expect when the product name itself is an adverb modifying a noun?' – in a world where adverbs are becoming extinct!"

I'm still struggling with what "The most protein for the least calories" might mean. Even if they were to render that statement grammatically correct, does it mean that they are offering the buyer some sort of trade?

The Right Stuff

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Once again, I will avoid comment on the misplaced apostrophe in this business card (because the problem has become boring in its ubiquity and, for all I know, may be accepted now - although don't you think it's ironic that while the era of texting is all about shortening words, it's becoming more and more acceptable to ADD apostrophes where they aren't needed?!).

Instead, I will marvel at the use of Orville and Wilbur's last name in place of "write". A comma is also missing, as is a dot (because an ellipsis needs three of them). I was certain that "Gobos" must be a gross error, but the contributor informed me that it refers to a kind of lighting ... although I think "Gobo Lights" would have been a better choice on this card, which promises me "much much more" - but I don't think I could stand it.

In all fairness, the front side of this card is error-free.

Thanks to A-J for this contribution!

Vowels are Going Fast!

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An anonymous fan of this site snapped this photo. It appears that the store has already liquidated all of its Es, which is not a surprise given that E is the most-used letter in many languages, including English. 

They Don't Grow them Literate Here

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There is something very fun about the lettering used on this sign ... or should I say the lettering and numbering? At any rate, the mixture of caps, small-caps and lower case conveys the kind of creativity that I appreciate in small-businesses.

Thanks to the anonymous, single-named "Michael" for this contribution.

Bang for Your Buck

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There are many humorous things about this sign. The misplaced apostrophe is not one of them.

Thanks again to Rudy & Michelle in Edmonton for this contribution.

It Feels Like an Eternity

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I love this sign. I enjoy contemplating its various possible meanings, depending on how you choose to pronounce "Enrty".

Thanks again to Gord from Winnipeg for his contribution!

Award-Winning Spelling

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Let us all hope that the award being given is not for written communication. Let us also hope that the writer of this sign is not up for the award.

Thanks to Rudy & Michelle in Edmonton, Alberta.

Drinking on the Job

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I'm thinking that someone needs to be told: "Don't drink and WORK!" but that's probably another sign for another place ....

Thanks to Gord from Winnipeg for this contribution!

Go West, Young Man!

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It's been a while since I had an example of my favorite grammatical error to post - the misuse of apostrophes! It is a plague on our great continent, particularly at 4' in height.

Thanks again to Rudy & Michelle in Edmonton for this contribution.